apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize