oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Randomize
