i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
