My nipple is on Facebook.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
