I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
