i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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