Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I'm like, not good at living.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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