I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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