dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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