you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
