Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
