My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
