Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
What drink are we having for lunch?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
