...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
