Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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