My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I think a kid would responsible me up
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
