he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
