The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
