We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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