2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize