Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
