Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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