careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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