what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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