i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
