I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
