Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
