oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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