Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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