I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
