im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
There's always time for handjobs
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
