Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
