Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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