Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
