And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
