I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
