Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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