We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize
