C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize