I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
