this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
