You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
so let's talk penis.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
