nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
