ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
