ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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