Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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