Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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