Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
