he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
