who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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