I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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