I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
