We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
tell me about the fingering
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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