She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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